Hello Nutters,

People often ask why Corax Asylum requires a theatre, a zoo, and a circus.

The answer is surprisingly simple.

An asylum without a theatre is merely a building full of mad people.

An asylum with a theatre is a building full of mad people who can be charged admission.

The theatre serves an important therapeutic purpose. Patients may watch tragedies and learn that other people are also miserable. This builds empathy. Alternatively, they may watch comedies and learn that other people are stupid. This builds confidence. Either outcome is medically beneficial.

The zoo is equally essential.

Many of our patients arrive believing they are animals.

Upon visiting the zoo they are able to compare themselves against the exhibits.

The success rate is remarkable.

In most cases the patient quickly concludes that they are not, in fact, a raven, wolf, squid, badger, or carnivorous horse.

In a few unfortunate cases the animal reaches the opposite conclusion.

Progress is not always linear.

As for the circus, I remain astonished that anyone would question its necessity.

The average patient spends twelve hours a day hearing voices, witnessing impossible things, suffering hallucinations, and questioning the nature of reality.

Removing the circus would therefore deprive them of the only familiar part of their routine.

Furthermore, clowns are frightening.

Patients who encounter something more frightening than their psychiatrist frequently report significant improvements in perspective.

This is science.

The circus also provides employment opportunities for demons, murderers, escaped aristocrats, itinerant musicians, failed magicians, and Behmor.

Behmor objected to this description.

His objection was noted and ignored.

Taken together, the theatre, zoo, and circus create a complete treatment programme.

The theatre educates.

The zoo informs.

The circus terrifies.

This is the foundation of modern medicine.

Indeed, I would go further.

I do not believe any institution can truly call itself an asylum unless at least one patient has escaped from a tiger, one patient has been booed off a stage, and one clown has been arrested for reasons that remain unclear.

Corax exceeds all recognised standards.

You are welcome.